It’s a long-standing joke that pregnant women get all kinds of unsolicited advice, most of which is actually pretty weird.
No, really – weird. As in, I will not afflict you with some of the things pregnant women are told, because my poor ears can never unhear and your poor eyes could never unsee. Just…Weird.
It’s not all even technically advice – some of it is more like unequivocable statements about what. will. happen.
Some of it is actually very good, though. Very good and very true.
I have several pregnant friends (always. I mean always as in – always some of my friends are pregnant, that is, not some of my friends are always pregnant. Actually…nevermind) so I thought I would share the good ones I can remember.
Because one of the true statements is that you’ll start forgetting more things. True. That one is true.
So, here is the list. Of the things I remember.
You forget things.
Covered that. True story, bro.
AKA, “The baby ate my brain.”
Maybe TMI. Don’t freak out. One of the things you’ll forget is that you even care. About forgetting. So…be chill.
Wait, what are we talking about?
The Mommy Wars are real.
Rise above. That’s all.
No, seriously. ALL THE SNACKS. For you, not the kid. The kid is drinking milk full-time. Snacks are for MOMMA. Do. Not. Take. My. Snacks.
Lots of Diapers.
You’ll love them anyway.
Everybody thinks their kid is the cutest.
Strange. True. Beneficial. Be grateful. Don’t ask too many questions. Of course your child is the cutest. (Actually MY child is the cutest, but…anyway carry on.)
Drink the coffee while you can.
My husband definitely just took away a cup that was two days old and handed me a new one. Excuse me while I…is that the baby crying?
There’s nothing like it.
There really isn’t. Nothing in the world. Before you experience it, you think nothing can explain it. After you experience it, you know nothing can explain it.
“Having a baby is falling in love with your husband all over again every day.”
An amazing woman wrote this at one of my baby showers. Out of many messages, this one jumped. And stuck with me. Because it’s true. (On that note, single friends – CHOOSE WISELY, as your husband will either win your heart repeatedly with his gentleness and consideration, or drive you nuts endlessly with his cluelessness. I have to imagine the second one, because my own husband is not afflicted with cluelessness.)
You have never experienced love before you meet your child.
And I don’t mean just for your child…one of the most overwhelming things about meeting Adeline was not only how much I loved her, but realizing how much I was loved. One thing my mom said to me shortly before Adeline was born I will never forget: “I love you. You’re about to find out just how much.” This was so true. I suddenly felt closer to every parent I knew, especially the mothers. My aunts, my grandmothers, my sister who has kids…it’s like you join a Not Secret Club, where it hits you how much love there really is to go around. Not mushy love…gut-wrenching, soul-fulfilling, vomit-cleaning love that wants to wrap every single thing up in itself and take all the hits and give all the grace. Makes you understand a lot more about God’s love too. Definitely the most overwhelming aspect of being a mom. Also the best.
For the record, I honestly think there’s more sleep than people let on. I mean, I feel like I sleep fine. So, there’s that. OR, God is just lulling me into a false sense of security so I have! all! the babies! and then twelve kids in realize no, there was just that one good kid who was like her father and now there are eleven more cazy ones who are like me and hello sleep deprivation and crazy town.
Anyway. Good times.
I love being a mom.